We see the delight in their eyes as they are getting spoiled silly with lollies and unlimited screen time. We see how amazed they are at the sheer size of outdoor space and family homes to explore. We almost regret our decision to not raise them closer to home where they can grow up with cousins and grandparents close by.
Life is comfortable here, when our friends and family get together it’s as though time hasn’t touched us, the banter is still there. Although there is occasionally interruption in the form of a kid’s scraped knee that needs to be kissed, then there are the pauses in conversations when the newly engaged couples exchange loving glances or sneak a reassuring arm squeeze.
I haven’t had good girly cocktail sessions or drawn out brunches with the girls for a while. I brought my girl out one evening with my girlfriends and she was stoked about being a big girl allowed her own strawberry calpis mocktail. It’s like that scene in SATC when Lily is colouring at one of their weekend brunches and the ladies changed their chat to how the men in their lives ‘colour’.
I am surprised that I do not miss those days of dolling up. Even carrying my LV purse out to town that evening felt foreign to my trusty Kate Spade. I cannot fit into the conversations here as my friends speak of travel plans to Japan, Bali or Fiji. I know in my heart I cannot come this far out to join them in those escapades. And when we talk about children there is divide between those who have children versus those who don’t yet. The ideals versus the reality and the subtle judging that goes on. I almost feel like choosing Europe over Australasia has made me snootier, with anecdotes of my toddler singing French and Spanish songs not viewed as cute but rather pretentious. I no longer fit in.
Throughout my twenties I lived for my girlfriends. We sipped many a soy lattes and lychee martini’s whilst debating the pros and cons of our men and our budding careers. So much of our lives were unwritten as yet. We had the world at our feet and could walk any path we wanted. Love was always a possibility each night we went out.
Now I am a flat white and ballet flats kinda mum. My girls are my world still only, I refer to my Number 1 and Number 2, not my girlfriends of my twenties. There are the mums I met through my daughters and I long to make a stronger connection with them. I also know there are relationships I’d have to work harder at to build at work, to forge greater networks for my career which I realise I have put on hold for the past year without intent.
Life moved on. I had the whirlwind romance with my Mr. Big. We broke up, made up and then married before he left me to move to London. My life phase now is SATC the movie the sequel where I cheat on bags with furniture. Or even perhaps I am not actually Carrie, I have really always been Charlotte with my Prince Charming to be surrounded by pretty princesses with a bra less nanny on her way soon. The picture of our family is complete.
When I leave Sydney this time, we begin our lives in our forever home. A Victorian four bedroom terrace in South West London surburbia. The set wrapped up with the four women moving up and away from New York anyway. We were and are the same women who fiercely love and protect each other through heartbreak and through life’s failures and successes. But though we want to be there for each other, the sisterhood gives way to Motherhood. Life isn’t as difficult as it used to be, or rather we are presented with different battles in the form of opinionated mother in laws and wilful toddlers. I look forward to creating a home in our terrace that is similar to the Brownstone in the movie ‘The Intern’. One that I stand in front of each day I come home knowing that behind the shutters in the sash window is my happy family and where my friends and theirs are always welcome to share in the joy and warmth.
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